I’m mortified that it’s been nearly a year since I last wrote here. That’s not to say I haven’t opened WordPress and stared at the blank square for an hour or two here and there…but…well…you ever get annoyed of hearing yourself talk? Or, in this case, reading your own over-angsty musings?
When you’ve been blogging as long as I have, sometimes, erm, I mean…often you repeat yourself – especially when you’re me and never seem to learn your lesson. [Although a kinder spirit might offer instead that I’m a romantic optimist who isn’t afraid to take risks, so…we can go with that I guess.]
The truth is, amidst all the personal and professional wins [and losses] I’ve had this year and falling in love (don’t worry, we’re coming back to this), Los Angeles is not an easy place to exist as a complicated human with big feelings.
Aside from having endless buckets of cash, success in the entertainment industry is often built on talking about and showing how great you’re doing and all that you’re working on – with perfectly aligned, Clorox-white teeth, perfect skin and a hot bod. So if you’re having a rough day, are a little fleshy, have mental health challenges, haven’t worked in a while (or any combination thereof), you better come up with some grandiose answer for how [great] you’re doing and all you’ve accomplished in the last month. And I’m sad to say, I bought into this for a while, and maybe am grappling with having still bought into it a little – “it” being the toxic belief that I have to suffer alone and quietly….which brings me to the Game Changer.
Let’s rewind back to June. I found myself on Tinder and I swiped right on a cute guy who spoke 4 languages fluently and “Just moved to LA from DC. Mainly looking to make friends and meet cool people.” Pretty safe-sounding with low pressure – sweet! Lucky for me, The Game Changer swiped right on me too….and his first message to me was as normal (for once) and healthy as his mini-bio seemed: “Hello, Chile Verde! *waving emoji*” And the text-conversation flowed as nicely and normally as it began.
No lewd comment?
No mansplaining or condescencion?
“Lol. He must be new here,” I thought.
Then. THEN. Before asking me out on a “pre-date” [you know – where you go have a coffee really quick before you decide if you’re up for committing more time and/or money on a proper date…like dinner or rollerskating or bowling or whatever]…this man scheduled a phone date with me. This man screened me……and you know what….I wasn’t mad about it. In fact, I loved it! It told me that he wasn’t interested in wasting either of our time and he wanted to make sure we got along and weren’t falsely advertising online. It also kind of felt like the days of adolescence when I’d spend hours “on the phone with a boy.”
Given that I moved into his apartment last month, I’d say our strong start continues to yield a strong run. I’m sure I’ll write more about some of the shenanigans that have happened between then and now [there are many], but I’m writing now because I want to share with you why this man is The Game Changer.
Before I launch into how great things are, I want to say that our relationship isn’t perfect, but it works for us. I know some of you who read this blog also follow me on Facebook or Instagram and I share a lot about our ridiculous puns or silly adventures – and there’s plenty of that happening, but I’m not going to say that TGC and I are free of conflict or misunderstanding or even hangry spells [most of which are mine]. However, he and I navigate those sticky patches as best [and honestly] as we know how…and knowing that at the end of the day, we’re doing our best, makes it all the better.
TGC changed the game because he has helped me raise my standards…and he challenges me. He knows still waters run deep and in between the abundance of kind supportive, cheerleading words, this man challenges the SH*T out of me by demanding my 100% authenticity.
Wanna know a secret? There are pieces of myself that I’m extremely stingy with…most of them pretty dark. I write often about having big feelings, but the truth is…they’re gargantuan. History has programmed my brain to believe that if I reveal these dark pieces, the receiver will run for the hills, blinded by the horror – never to return.
However, when I find myself in a puddle of boogers and tears, breathless from these gargantuan feelings, convinced that this is the time I will have killed “Us,” TGC hits me with, “What else you got?”
If this were a battle, I’d call him a worthy opponent…but he’s very much on my side…making him a worthwhile partner – and then some – changing the game [and me] for the better.
A few more light-hearted ways The Game Changer changed the game (this list is not exhaustive):
His pun-game is stellar.
His practical jokes are pretty solid. His regular jokes aren’t bad either.
He’s a true gentleman…mostly.
He speaks FOUR languages fluently. FOUR! [English, Arabic, French, Spanish]
We are in entirely the same industries – hospitality and entertainment.
I can’t remember the last day he didn’t tell me how beautiful and smart I am.